mr tabloid

Kevin Federline still has feelings for his vagina-flashing ex-wife Britney Spears. Could there be a reunion in the works? And, God help us all, another offspring down the line? Showbiz Spy reports:

“I still love Britney. She’s the mother of my children,” Federline, 30, said.
And Jamie Spears — Britney’s dad — is even reportedly encouraging the pair to reunite.

Ack! Britney’s dad is trying to make this happen?! WTGDF?! Seriously, if these two get back together you know she’s popping out another kid then going off the deep end. And I was really starting to like how things are now. You know, where I hardly ever see her face anymore. Do you know how hard it is to constantly type Frappucino? I had to hire midgets to move my fingers. True story.

Rikki Rockett, drummer for Poison, was arrested on rape charges for an incident that occurred in September at the Silver Star Casino in Mississippi. Rikki is out of jail and awaiting a district attorney’s decision to see if the case will go before a grand jury. The AP reports:

“The subject, Rikki Rockett, forcibly had sex with an adult in one of the hotel rooms,” according to a complaint.
Sciple said the woman contacted authorities several days after the alleged attack. He did not discuss details of the case, but said his office believed the woman’s complaint warranted review by the district attorney.

Did Rikki do it? Oh yeah. I mean, look at the guy. Not exactly a pussy magnet. Also he’s the drummer for Poison. He’d have better luck saying he still lives with his parents. It works for me. Okay, not really but, one day it will. As soon as my mom stops making me wear my retainer to the bar. I got a beer can stuck in it the other day for crying out loud. The ladies don’t want to make out with a face full of Beast Ice. No matter how much chapstick you cover it up with. (Read: two tubes.)

NOTW is reporting that Britney’s ex Fedejerk is tired of being single—and wants her BACK!  Apparently her Dad Jamie is even getting in on the act. He called Britney and encouraged the reunion.  K-Fed said: “I still love Britney. She’s the mother of my children.”

Lets hope this is not true - all she needs is to have this loser back in her life - he was the beginning of her spiral fall!

Ashley Alexandra Dupre’s business is booming. But this time not in her pantalones. Donald Trump has made an offer to Ashley for her to appear on a new untitled reality show set to air on MTV, according to People:

Based on a British show called Ladette to Lady, the show will take a group of 15 hard-partying young women and send them off to a boarding school environment where they’ll learn to become more ladylike.
“She’s the perfect candidate,” the show insider says of Dupré, the 22-year-old at the center of the Gov. Eliot Spitzer prostitution scandal. The show has not yet heard back from Dupré with any reaction to the offer.

Only in America can a hooker that caused the demise of a powerful political figure become a reality TV star. Somewhere in the afterlife, Ben Franklin is plowing a chick in a Viking helmet with tears in his eyes. Our little country is everything he dreamed it could be - which almost makes up for the lack of gravy in heaven. They don’t tell you that part in the Bible. Jerks.

It was the best of both worlds at Saturday’s Kids’ Choice Awards for Miley Cyrus, who took home trophies for favorite female singer and TV actress and rocked the show with a spirited performance of her hit song, “GNO — Girls Night Out.”

It was also a slime spectacle for the Nickelodeon children’s television network, which broadcast the 21st annual show live from UCLA’s Pauley Pavilion in front of 10,000 screaming fans, almost all of them teens and preteens.

Akon crashed a dune buggy into giant containers of Nickelodeon’s trademark green slime, Usher blasted a sumo wrestler several yards with slime fired from a cannon and supermodel Heidi Klum, attached to a bungee cord and wearing a specially equipped “butt spike belt,” flung herself into a wall covered with slime-filled balloons.

(more…)

The Panettiere family!

Demi and her daughter Tallulah Belle - lucky girl much prettier than her sister Rumer.

Mischa Barton stepped out in a sporty combination of shorts and sweatshirt.   Misha revealed that she has dimpled thighs with cellulite - makes me feel not so bad about my cottage cheese/cellulite legs.