mr tabloid

The ‘old’ Britney

Police cars have been rushed to Britney Spears after she tried to take her own life . Police arrived at Britney’s home around 10 pm and cordoned off Britney’s home. Britney’s mother rushed to her house and is now inside with Britney.

It appears as Britney is okay. It is a media circus outside the gated community where Britney lives. Police, helicopters, news agencies and almost 100 photographers are camped outside.

X17 photographers have been in touch with Alli Sims and she told them she is on her way to Brit’s home right now. She would not comment further on the evening’s events. Britney’s mother and Sam Lufti have also said Britney is okay.

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Update: Britney is being committed again. Britney’s psychiatrist visited her tonight and he was alarmed with Britney’s recent behavior. The doctor decided Britney needs to be hospitalized on another 5150 hold. He has called for police who are en route, yet no officials have entered the house.

According to TMZ, Britney did not try to harm herself.

TMZ claims Lynne Spears is at the house and is upset with the shrink. Sam Lutfi is in favor of the 5150, given Britney’s mental state.

Britney is said to be non-responsive about the whole thing and completely out of it.

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20 police cars are heading towards Britney’s house and there also two ambulances on route.

Update: Alli Sims just arrived. TMZ was told there is “extreme tension inside the house” between Sam Lutfi and members of Spears’ family.

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Update: The ambulance has arrived with covered up windows.

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Update: Law enforcement sources tell TMZ Britney’s psychiatrist got in touch with the North Hollywood division of the LAPD and set tonight’s events in motion. Law enforcement sources tell TMZ the psychiatrist who called police never mentioned anything about a suicide, but rather her reckless driving and erratic behavior.

Update:

The ambulance has left the side exit of Brit’s neighborhood and is believed to be headed to Cedars-Sinai with Britney inside.

Update:

TMZ has learned the media frenzy surrounding Britney’s drama has caused cops to speak in code over the police radio. Britney’s code name is “The Package.” Law enforcement sources have told us their arrival at Britney’s house has been planned all evening. Furthermore we’re told the original plan was for cops to pick Britney up last night, but that didn’t happen.

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Paris Hilton posed for photos outside of the Ed Sullivan Theater last night. She was making an appearance on The Late Show with David Letterman to promote her new movie The Hottie and The Nottie. Even more surprising than her movie not going straight to video, are the fans waiting outside and presenting her with a bouquet of roses. Apparently these people are so inspired by Bigfoot they’ll brave the New York cold just to scream “Paris, we love you!” and the always popular, “Viva la genital sores!”

Leah Remini wants to have some relevance to her life since King of Queens went off the air, so she’s angling to be godmother to her good friend Jennifer Lopez’s unborn baby(s), according to People:

“We’re asking for an audition for godparent roles,” Remini, 36, joked to PEOPLE at the premiere after-party for her new comedy Over Her Dead Body Tuesday night. “Um … so, we’re waiting to hear back.”

I think Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony should seriously consider Leah’s case. I mean, Leah is an OT V in Scientology. I’m assuming that means she’s allowed to look at Tom Cruise’s face. But not in the eyes. Anyway, she has experience dealing with aliens which, let’s be real, one or two of them are popping out of that J-uterus. I know for a fact that Marc Anthony crash landed at Roswell. Then he salsa-danced his way out of the wreckage and into our hearts.

NOTE: Here’s a crazed letter from Leah Remini urging other Scientologists to become “clear” by crossing a bridge with rainbows or something. It’s sort of like Lord of the Rings but less believable.

Britney Spears is reportedly on medication for bipolar disorder. She has seen several psychiatrists and has one that visits her regularly. Friends claim Britney does well on the medication, but when she feels normal she quits taking it causing her to go batshit. However, one professional tells TMZ the medication is just flat-out not working:

That same professional tells TMZ, “She’s really trying. Whether it works — we’ll have to see.” That person also says it’s extremely frustrating when the media shows video of Britney out on the town acting crazy, adding, “She has a disease. Sometimes when you see her she’s in the middle of an episode. It’s like mocking someone with Down syndrome.”

Wow. Did that person just say Britney Spears has Down syndrome? That’s a bit harsh. To people with Down syndrome that is. They try their best and are surprisingly great with kids. Britney on the other hand; well, she’s great with, uh, I dunno, socks?

James Gandolfini decided to rough up a fan he encountered at JFK airport yesterday. The guy claimed to be a huge fan of Tony Soprano and kept pushing for an autograph, according to the Daily Mail:

The affection was clearly not mutual, with an irritated Gandolfini grabbing the man by his collar and punching him, claiming he came to close to his girlfriend Deborah Lin.
The fan said: “I’m just trying to find out how to be a Soprano.” Gandolfini responded: “Well, that’s how you do it.”

Tony Soprano quickly had a change of heart (i.e. didn’t want to get sued) and posed for a photo with his victim/superfan. Wait a minute. Jordan Bratman?

Us Weekly is claiming to have a source close to Angelina Jolie that says she is definitely pregnant. Word is Angelina is going to auction off confirmation of the news and donate the proceeds to charity:

One SAG attendee tells Us in its latest issue, on newsstands now, “It was so obvious she was pregnant. You could clearly see the bump’s outline.”

OK! Magazine is also reporting the bun’s in the oven. But enough about that. Let’s get down to brass tacks. I bid $1 billion* for the exclusive confirmation interview. For the record, I like to prepare a meal for all my interviewees. Hopefully Angelina likes Easy Mac out of a Tupperware dish. Also, I cook in the nude. That’s the naked nude, ladies.

*To be paid in $1 yearly installments. Dollar may be substituted for gum wrapper at any time. Gum not included.

Adnan Ghalib tests boner pills. Let’s pause for a moment and reflect on the best lead written in the history of journalism. Fantastic. Anyway, some of you might have heard of this, but apparently Adnan is on a panel of guys who test male enhancement products. You can see his bio on SexHealthReview.com. (He’s the third one down. Can’t miss him.) Here’s what it says in case your work doesn’t want you reading about erections:

Occupation: Filmmaker.
Tell Us a Little Something About Yourself:
I work in “the” industry in Los Angeles and I know many of my friends use these products. Thought this would be an interesting opportunity to reveal the truth to many men worldwide.

What is Adnan hinting at by saying he works in “the” industry? Does he work in porn? Or is he not only impotent but unable to properly use quotations? I don’t see how I’m supposed to trust a guy to inform me about Spermamax when he can’t even use the correct punctuation. I don’t want to think I’ll have “a” massive boner only to find out it’s a non-quoted erection. That’s just embarrassing.

Tom Cruise is receiving a new Ducati Desmosedici RR motorcycle this week. Tom is receiving the very first model of the only 1,500 made. The cycle cost $72,500 and can reach speeds of 200 mph, according to NY Daily News:

Cruise, whose net worth is upwards of $250 million, is known to have an affinity for fast vehicles, including motorcycles, Porsches and planes. Some estimate the actor spent $1 million in 2006 on fuel alone.

A million smackers on gas? Jesus. Somewhere Al Gore is reading this with eco-friendly steam coming out his ears. He’s probably wishing he didn’t make that promise to Gary Coleman to never kick a midget again. But he never said anything about face punching…

Katie Holmes has fuelled rumors she is pregnant by buying a “Big Sister” t-shirt for daughter Suri. She visited Los Angeles baby boutique Petit Tresor with Suri and husband Tom Cruise. She spent over $2000 on baby clothes. A source said: “Katie ordered loads of cute girlie spring dresses for Suri. But she also bought a pink t-shirt which said ‘Big Sister’ and two matching romper suits, one which said ‘Little Sister’ and one which said ‘Little Brother’.”

It was recently reported the former Dawson’s Creek actress wants to give birth to her next child before turning 30 in December. A source said: “She had it all figured out. She would shoot her new movie and then get pregnant. She was hoping to have the baby by the end of the year, go back to work next spring and have another film out by the end of 2009.”

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Lindsay Lohan’s changes men as fast as she changes her clothes.

Lindsay was out last night, Jan. 28, in NYC with Jeremy Greene, 25, a NYC songwriter and R&B artist. “Before they walked into the Four Seasons Hotel together, where Lindsay was staying, someone yelled out, ‘Lindsay, who is that guy?’ And she said, ‘He’s my new boyfriend!’

“They spent the evening driving around together. Lindsay stopped at a boutique to go shopping. Before they went back to her hotel, he was singing to her, and she loved his voice. Then they kissed, and there were definitely sparks between them!”

Only two days before, Lindsay was hanging out with her ex, Stavros Niarchos, at NYC’s The Box.

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